Team South can neither confirm, nor deny that Who Dares Wins are an elite force of special operatives working for a cross Governmental organisation known as Flange-Ops. Unfortunately most of their work is classified. Every day, Flange-Ops go into action so that you can sleep safe at night. Here is their story... or at least as much as we can publish:

REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED beef curtains, REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED Kieth Chegwin dressed as a penguin REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED rectal trauma REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED headshot from over 80 feet. REDACTED REDACTED Tucker Carlson REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED USCSS Nostromo REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED in space, no one can hear you bum Fern Cotton.

REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED slingshot around the moon REDACTED Nissan Micra 1.0 IG-T 92 Acenta 5dr which has the cruise control and air conditioning. REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED bummed in the gob to death REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED Right Said Fred REDACTED REDACTED failed their entrance trials. REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED punched his head clean off REDACTED REDACTED "Stitch that!"REDACTED smells like almonds.

REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED the drummer from Nirvana looks just like Dave Grohl REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED Magic the Gathering REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED wanking into a shot glass REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED salty apocalypse REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED M1 Newport Pagnell Services Northbound REDACTED REDACTED improbable amounts of Cheddar.

Universal Exports REDACTED Warhammer 40,000 Second Edition Codex Eldar REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED discovered that piss is actually stored in the balls REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED Club Tropicana with Universal Exports who were drunk and REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED another salty apocalypse REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED Douglas Bader's false legs REDACTED REDACTED a clone of Adolf Hitler. Again.

And I'm afraid that's all we could get past the censors at the UN and MI-5. I wish we could say more, but we'd have to shoot you in the balls so hard that your entire family would die.

And that is really, really hard.