Pirates of the Caribbean writeup

Pirates of the Caribbean writeup

Event info:

Date 27 - 29th July 2018
Venue Driver Wood Paintball, Old Hollow, Copthorne RH10 4TA
Promoter Urban Paintball
Players Rocket, Ricktion, Little Dave, Corky, MrP
Result Loss / Aquatic Loss


This was the first Big game for the new DriverWood paintball site. UE played here fairly recently at the Battle of the Bulge game, but this was the start of the transitions toward bigger events: a combination of walk-on and big game mechanics rolled into one weekend.

The games were mainly walkon style, but with the added advantage of fighting over real-life beer, rum and chocolate.

Maximum effort

The games started on Friday. However, as we have jobs, none of us got there until after 5 so we went to the pub. Well... most of us did. Mr P was not allowed in as his clothes were too smart and he looked like an 'out of towner'. For his own safety he was refused entry to all the pubs apart from one old man, but not racist old man pub that sold craft ales. This pleased us, what with us being old men, and at least when compared to the locals - not racist. We also had the UE standard Friday night Chinese.

Saturday Game

Saturday we arrived early, after a night in the bed bug ridden hotel. This was also followed by a poor breakfast, so the motivation wasn't exactly high. We lost the first game as we were still not awake.

However the coffee kicked in shortly, as did key game motivators. The next few games had kegs of beer and bottles of rum as objectives that the winning team got to keep. Suddenly UE stepped up and won a few games on the bounce. We collected a few creates of beer and bottle of rum for our troubles.

Another game involved collected chocolate from the field, but we lost this game as due to the obvious admin error of eating most of the winnings before we did the final count up.

But we definitely took the moral and calorific victory, as our stomachs started to ache with all the quaffing and gorging on beer and chocolate.

Saturday Night

At this point, the day was basically over. We left, got showered and went to the pub. The traditional saturday night curry was followed by more non-racist, old man drinks. After a few of these, we then returned to the site for more cans and banter. Which was nice.

Sunday Day

The Sunday was also the same weekend as the regular walk-on, so a few more players turned up to get stuck in.

First game was a long game involving patrolling across a large densely wooded area. This was a kills-to-win situation. This was actually extremely good fun. It was proper scenario game involving real patrolling and advancing to contact. As you can imagine there was lots of sneeky-sneeky stuff going on, and due to the size of the area, there was not a true front line. With an extra 20 players it would have been an awesome game instead of just a good one. This game was exceptionally hard work, but you know... perhaps you should just lay off the steak bakes for a bit?

After lunch we got straight on it, but there was no beer or rum left as we had drunk it all. The objectives were thus replaced with blow up dolls and sheep. Yet again, as you can imagine we did very well for some reason that definitely isn't creepy.

Additional maximum effort

The afternoon was short games. Some of these suffered from the usual team size issues. For example - we got annihilated on the slapstick field as the teams were not level.

After that is was time to leave for long slog back up north. Once again thanks to Gareth and the Urban guys. The game was generally well played and as usual the service was great with plenty of hippie food and free hipster water. However, there was no comedy chip pan fire which was a slight disappointment.