Stalingrad writeup

Stalingrad Event Writeup

Event info:

Date 19th November 2017
Venue Bullswoods Skirmish
Players Rocket, Ricktion (MIA), Capt Price, Soap, Mountain
Hangers on Dinan
Result Loss


This was the second time attending the UK's best walk-on. It is a one day event, but for us it all started the day before! UE decided to make a lads weekend of it and went to an F1 simulator for a race.

At the venue there were 10 hydraulic simulator units equipped with surround screens. You sit in a replica F1 car, racing a real F1 track with 9 other people. After 15 minutes practice, we all realised that we were rubbish drivers and the 'set-up' was in hard mode.

We moaned at the instructors, it was turned up to mega-bastard-real-hard and we began a full race.

After 30 minutes or so I managed to complete a lap and started to enjoy it. However, at that point the game ended. Still it was great fun, and as it turned out, some UE members had made the podium. Top work!


Game one was a Mortar assault. The Russians were in a fixed defensive position, and were not allowed to advance up the field. The Germans had to land mortar shells in the enemy base to score.

The gener-LOLZ

The initial charge was decimated by the defending Russians with full pots and air. There was plenty of paint flying around, but the game was 1 hour long and after 30mins or so the Germans started to make good progress. They actually got up to front door of the fort, scoring several hits with the mortar.

Safezone defenders

Game two was a Tank assault. The Germans had the fixed position, and the Russians has to get a tank in range to score points. However, the Germans could also destroy the tank by using a rocket launcher.

Right from the start the Germans had the upper hand and took out the tank several times, forcing it back to the start line. As the game progressed, it was clear that in the second half of the hour the better organised Russians started to invade the German base and it looked as though the German base would be overrun. After a heroic defence by a few plucky Germans the base was held - just.

After two games the score was tied on 110 points each, which was convenient for the decider!


Game three was the Flag decider. The whole field was in play, and had 5 flag positions set up. Each team just had to turn the flags in their favour - a simple enough concept. This was a 2 hour game with the score taken at game end.

The first 30 mins or so it was 50/50 with flags changing orientation regularly.

As the game wore on the Russians began to take field positions, pushing the Germans back to just outside the main base. The Germans were left fighting over one flag position and after many hero charges onto ferocious enemy fire, we finally gave it up as a bad job. We conceded the positions to the Russians as we had run out of energy, and our skin has become more black and blue than I would like to admit.

With 5 minutes to go the Russian charged the Germans and overran the main base and secured victory and a convincing win for Jeremy Corbyn.

Stalingrad Event Writeup